Boom Boom

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Calling the shots
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2020 9:46 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Calling the shots » Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:50 pm

I went to a wedding to congratulate the bride and groom and was told to say a few words.

I said, "Plethora"

They both came up to me afterwards and said, "Thanks, that means a lot"

Calling the shots
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2020 9:46 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Calling the shots » Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:59 pm

A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff

Baa-dum-ssss

Calling the shots
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2020 9:46 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Calling the shots » Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:59 pm

People are shocked when they find out how bad I am at working with electricity.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 16, 2020 11:41 pm

Calling the shots wrote:
Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:59 pm
People are shocked when they find out how bad I am at working with electricity.
Definitely done that one 😀

shots1965
Posts: 460
Joined: Sat Mar 30, 2013 8:16 pm
Location: Oklahoma USA
Re: Boom Boom

Post by shots1965 » Thu Sep 17, 2020 1:52 am

Anon E Mouse wrote:
Wed Sep 16, 2020 11:41 pm
Calling the shots wrote:
Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:59 pm
People are shocked when they find out how bad I am at working with electricity.
Definitely done that one 😀
Still not funny second time around
😀😀😀

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:02 am

Do you reckon Jeremy Irons ever quietly chuckles to himself while he’s ironing?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:03 am

I found a box of frozen fish in the street the other day.
I was going to hand it in to the police, but then decided it was a case of Findus kippers...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:04 am

My son's pet frog broke his leg yesterday 😢

He was very unhoppy...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:05 am

Basil Brush was the first fox to break the sound barrier...

Boom Boom!

Shots1954
Posts: 188
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:55 am

I look up to the people repairing Big Ben, they are working round the clock!

Shots1954
Posts: 188
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Thu Sep 17, 2020 12:57 pm

The string quartet who mugged me in February have finally been arrested. They've admitted to robbery with violins.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 7:11 pm

Need to find out the cost of buying one of those Elizabethan circular neck garments for a fancy dress party.

Can anyone give me a ruff estimate?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 7:11 pm

"Does this uniform make me look fat?” - insecurity guard

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 7:12 pm

My wife said she's leaving me because of my unhealthy obsession with plants...

I said where's this stemming from petal?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2037
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 17, 2020 10:34 pm

I popped into a shop. I was going to get six cans of Sprite. When I got home, I had picked seven up.


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