Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:23 am

I have a picture of Jesus that pops up on my computer monitor if I leave it idle for 10 minutes.

It’s my screen saviour.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:27 am

When the World Conker Championship is on, we should all get behind the British team, after all they do it on a shoestring !

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:28 am

I keep dreaming that I am smashing cornflakes with a hammer...... turns out I am a cereal killer

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:29 am

Fantastic offer on Amazon - if you buy all Adam & The Ants sheet music, they'll throw in a Stand & Deliver!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:29 am

I just watched a brilliant film about a guy who poured meat juice's over a non fiction book.

It was baste on a true story.

WTF
Posts: 406
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 27, 2020 2:17 pm

Today at church we welcomed the Rev. Furlong... His service went the Extra mile.. 😇.....
Ps.. I'll start Walking.. 😜

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 2:39 pm

I've just joined a new band, we're called 'Cat's Eyes'...

We just play middle of the road stuff.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 2:40 pm

“What do we want?”

“More ‘Mavis from Coronation Street’ impersonations.”

“When do we want them?”

“Well, I don't really know...”

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 2:40 pm

When I was a child, my dad used to feed me alphabet soup claiming that I loved it...

I didn't really - he was just putting words in my mouth...

WTF
Posts: 406
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 27, 2020 2:57 pm

I had a job at the local park the park keeper asked me to make a bandstand so I took away all the chairs.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:29 pm

If two vegans have an argument is it still called a 'beef'?

Or is it a quornfrontation?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:32 pm

At this point I would feel safer if the coronavirus held a press conference, telling us how it is going to protect us from the government!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:33 pm

Interviewer: "I heard you were extremely quick at maths?"

Me: "Yes, as a matter of fact I am."

Interviewer: "What's 14x27?"

Me: "49."

Interviewer: "That's not even close!"

Me: "YeahI know, but it was fast!"

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:34 pm

I have something to say and I'm going to shout it out from the rooftops...

"Someone has nicked my ladder!"

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:35 pm

I had sex with a hooker last night. I must have been drunk...

I can't even remember going into the rugby club!


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