Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:36 pm

WTF wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 3:28 pm
Anon E Mouse wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 12:24 pm
I was walking along the street and a bloke tried to give me a chicken . I thought to myself I'm going to have to make a run for it .
I hope you are going to crack another one Anon?
Don't get me started on Chicken jokes. They are normally full of fowl language. :D

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:37 pm

Pupil: Will I be punished for something I haven't done?
Teacher: Of course you won't.
Pupil: That's good, as I haven't done my homework.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:37 pm

Before digital photography existed, you had to send your negatives off to be developed.
Whilst waiting for my photo's to be delivered, I found myself singing a song from Snow White. "Some day my prints will come."

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:39 pm

I've stopped watching Rugby Union .
If you've seen one match you've seen a maul .

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:39 pm

Penultimate is my last but one favourite word.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:40 pm

Me and the wife bought the star wars box set and watched them back to back.

Unfortunately I wasn't the one facing the screen.

WTF
Posts: 406
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:41 pm

My mate got to work on a building site this morning and saw one of the labourers dressed as a Red Indian.
Puzzled, he said to bloke “why are you dressed like that ?”.
Labourer says “Well, as I was leaving on Friday night , I heard the gaffer on his phone, saying that come Monday morning, he was going to start sacking all the Cowboys!

bordon shot
Posts: 209
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 9:13 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by bordon shot » Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:42 pm

All the organs of the body were having a meeting,
Trying to decide who was the one in charge.
"I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."
"I should be in charge," said the blood, "Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge," said the stomach," Because I process food and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge," said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "Because I allow the body to see where it goes."
I should be in charge," said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible for waste removal."
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum
And insulted him,
So in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache,
The stomach was bloated,
The legs got wobbly,
The eyes got watery,
And the blood was toxic..
They all decided that the rectum should be the boss
.
The Moral of the story?
Even though the others do all the work...
An Arse Hole is usually in charge

WTF
Posts: 406
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Mon Sep 28, 2020 6:12 pm

Anon E Mouse wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:36 pm
WTF wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 3:28 pm
Anon E Mouse wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 12:24 pm
I was walking along the street and a bloke tried to give me a chicken . I thought to myself I'm going to have to make a run for it .
I hope you are going to crack another one Anon?
Don't get me started on Chicken jokes. They are normally full of fowl language. :D

80fc
Posts: 184
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 12:20 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by 80fc » Mon Sep 28, 2020 6:18 pm

I thought I'd surprise the postman and stood at the door completely naked. I'm not sure what surprised him most the fact that I was naked or that I knew where he lived.

Me Mums a Shot
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2012 8:31 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Me Mums a Shot » Mon Sep 28, 2020 8:09 pm

Two weeks isolation if you come back from Iceland .... anybody know if it's the same with farm foods????

Me Mums a Shot
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2012 8:31 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Me Mums a Shot » Mon Sep 28, 2020 8:16 pm

The founder of Dulux was found dead on top of a mountain today in freezing conditions.

Rescuers said he could have done with another coat.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 10:41 pm

80fc wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 6:18 pm
I thought I'd surprise the postman and stood at the door completely naked. I'm not sure what surprised him most the fact that I was naked or that I knew where he lived.
Done

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 10:42 pm

Me Mums a Shot wrote:
Mon Sep 28, 2020 8:16 pm
The founder of Dulux was found dead on top of a mountain today in freezing conditions.

Rescuers said he could have done with another coat.
Done as well. All good though. Impossible not to dulex plicate

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2659
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 28, 2020 10:43 pm

Man comes in from work & tells his wife he's made a discovery. She says you've been working for Land Rover for 5 years, it's not funny anymore.


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