Boom Boom

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Me Mums a Shot
Posts: 90
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2012 8:31 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Me Mums a Shot » Thu Oct 15, 2020 10:20 pm

An illusionist who cuts people in two during his stage act was asked how long he’d been doing it for. He said it was a family thing - his step-Dad did the same before him and he’s now got two half sisters and a half brother doing it too.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 7:30 am

I bought a signed photo of Ronnie Corbett, while my friend bought a signed photo of Ronnie Barker.

It was good buy from me,
and a good buy from him...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 7:31 am

I once visited an exclusive Roman toilet on the 6th floor.

Yes, it was the VI P room.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 7:32 am

My pet snail told me yesterday that his slimy trail embarrassed him.
I can see where he's coming from.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 7:36 am

Pubs in Liverpool.

Soup of the Day :-
Carling £2.80

Shots1954
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:12 pm

My wife ran off with the milkman.
Watching them drive away was the longest 4 hours of my life!

Shots1954
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:13 pm

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’m doing a 0.00005K run to raise awareness of laziness.

Shots1954
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:14 pm

Just got a Yazz sat nav, it’s useless, the only way is up !

Shots1954
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:15 pm

I had a car once
I called it Flattery.
It got me nowhere.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:30 pm

What is a cats favourite breakfast?
Mice Krispies.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:31 pm

I once accidentally locked myself inside a glass cabinet in a museum...

Ended up making a complete exhibition of myself...

Shots1954
Posts: 279
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:50 pm

Just finished my first jigsaw puzzle, in only 3 weeks...... says on the box 3 to 5 years!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:50 pm

Dear people, don't carry your emotional baggage with you.

I present you, the grief-case.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:51 pm

Today I thought of a color that doesn't exist...

but then I realized it was just a pigment of my imagination.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2575
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Oct 16, 2020 1:51 pm

Why are demons fat.

Because they hate exorcising.


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