Boom Boom

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WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 10:22 am

I bought a Christmas sign from Amazon but I only got 3 letters I Cannot find the fourth letter it’s not in the packaging NOE are the only letters I received !!!!

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 10:22 am

What’s it like working as a lift operator?

Oh, It has its ups and downs.......

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 10:23 am

My boss said to me "why do you come out in a rash when I give you your wages?"

I said "it's because I'm allergic to peanuts!"

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:03 am

I've just changed my washing powder......

It was a Bold move!

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:05 am

Following my success building a boat in my attic, I am looking into building a plane in the cellar, I wonder if it will take off?

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:23 am

Did you know that Davy Crocket had a birth defect. He had 3 ears.
A left ear. A right ear and a wild front ear.......

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:24 am

What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well dressed man on a bike

A tire........

WTF
Posts: 523
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:25 am

I had to change my dentist.... The old one was so depressing - always looked down in the mouth.......

Fuggletim
Posts: 436
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sun Nov 22, 2020 11:35 am

I caught a train to Farnham the other day and walked from the platform across the level crossing with my colleague. I mentioned that you could always tell when a train had passed by.

He said "How?"

I said it leaves its tracks......

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 2:02 pm

How would a spy know he has run out of invisible ink?

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 2:04 pm

A dad is washing his car with his son son asks why not use a sponge instead.......?

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 2:04 pm

My cross-eyed wife and I just got a divorce. I found out she was seeing someone on the side.........

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 2:07 pm

Man goes into the doctor says "I keep thinking i'm Tom Jones" doctor says..... "Thats not unusual"........

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 2:11 pm

My mate said "When you were younger did you like George Best?"

I replied "No I preferred Zippy."

Shots1954
Posts: 426
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sun Nov 22, 2020 3:00 pm

My local garage has just sacked their apprentice.
He kept putting petrol in the oil sump.

What a dipstick!


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