Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

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Birdman
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Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 9:47 am
Location: Aldershot
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Birdman » Thu May 05, 2022 2:10 pm

Richard Petty wrote:
Thu May 05, 2022 1:19 pm
I bought a greyhound yesterday.

My wife said, "Are you going to race him?"

I said, "No, he’s much faster than me!"
Flippin’ ‘eck, Richard, Mousey used that one on Saturday. It’s even on the same page. :roll: :D
“The benefit of hindsight can be a wonderful thing.”

Richard Petty
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Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Richard Petty » Thu May 05, 2022 2:35 pm

Birdman wrote:
Thu May 05, 2022 2:10 pm
Richard Petty wrote:
Thu May 05, 2022 1:19 pm
I bought a greyhound yesterday.

My wife said, "Are you going to race him?"

I said, "No, he’s much faster than me!"
Flippin’ ‘eck, Richard, Mousey used that one on Saturday. It’s even on the same page. :roll: :D
His Greyhound was was quicker than mine

Ah well they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, does copying a joke count :lol:
The old saying goes "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all the people all the time." In fact sometimes it seems impossible to even please some of the people any of the time

Fuggletim
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Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim » Fri May 06, 2022 7:29 pm

The ball came over and before it could bounce, I kicked it back with such power it sailed over the other players straight into the top right hand corner of the net! Ecstatic, even though I knew I would get a yellow card, I took my shirt off and went running over the screaming fans.

It was at that point, the team Captain said:

“Tim: you just don’t get the rules of Volleyball, do you?”

Anon E Mouse
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Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat May 07, 2022 8:48 am

My cat has just eaten three mallards!

He's a duck filled fatty puss.
Roll on next season.

Fuggletim
Posts: 1305
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim » Sat May 07, 2022 9:00 am

I have invented a pen which has a small bell at the end of it. The patent is pen ding…….

Richard Petty
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Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Richard Petty » Sat May 07, 2022 9:50 am

My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “I am leaving you, this isn’t working.” I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door and it’s working fine!
The old saying goes "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all the people all the time." In fact sometimes it seems impossible to even please some of the people any of the time

Richard Petty
Posts: 2763
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Richard Petty » Sat May 07, 2022 9:51 am

It’s really important to establish a good vocabulary.
If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
The old saying goes "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all the people all the time." In fact sometimes it seems impossible to even please some of the people any of the time

Fuggletim
Posts: 1305
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim » Sat May 07, 2022 3:10 pm

Went and visited the house where I grew up in Hindhead. I knocked on the door and asked if I could come in and have a look round for nostalgia’s sake. There was an abrupt “No! Clear off or I’ll call the Police!”

Never really did get on with my Mum……

Fuggletim
Posts: 1305
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim » Sun May 08, 2022 3:55 pm

A van carrying copies of “Roget’s Thesarus” has overturned on the way to Waterstones in Farnham. Witnesses were said to be shocked, stunned, stupefied, dumbstruck, amazed, mortified, and horrified!

South Coast Shot
Posts: 279
Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2022 8:20 am
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by South Coast Shot » Mon May 09, 2022 7:37 pm

I tried to take a selfie in the shower before, I wasn’t happy with it cos it came out all blurry.

I've got selfie steam issues.
I'm here all week. Or at least until I'm banned.

Chalkie
Posts: 253
Joined: Thu Mar 22, 2007 12:50 am
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Chalkie » Tue May 10, 2022 9:50 pm

I received a text today from my girlfriend saying she was breaking up with me.

Image how relieved I was, when a couple of minutes later she texted "Sorry wrong number".
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy ****....What a ride!"

South Coast Shot
Posts: 279
Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2022 8:20 am
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by South Coast Shot » Wed May 11, 2022 11:17 am

Vincent Price was taller than Katie Price & heavier than Alan Price.....

I found that out on a Price comparison website....
I'm here all week. Or at least until I'm banned.

Fuggletim
Posts: 1305
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim » Wed May 11, 2022 6:36 pm

New historical research has revealed Norman soldiers eat small trays of Spanish food immediately prior to the 1066 Battle of Hastings. This detail was found in a close look at the Bayeaux Tapas Tray….

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 6405
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed May 11, 2022 11:04 pm

It was 11 years ago today that my pal Jeremy came running out of the room with tears in his eyes shouting 'it's a boy, it's a boy'.

Last time we go to Thailand.
Roll on next season.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 6405
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu May 12, 2022 8:29 am

I once went for a job interview to be the 4th band member of A-Ha but they refused to take on me...
Roll on next season.


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